atmosphere, just a ten-letter word

at a homestay in North York right now. a short ride on the subway will apparently take me to downtown Taranah (wow that looks extremely odd spelled that way). anyway i'm super exhausted and should be sleeping or figuring shit out, but i'm not.

yesterday night, i saw Rox, Matt, and Dara for the last time. AHHHHHH! i'm sad. we walked around the park for a bit and then went to Ana's party, where i gave everyone good-bye hugs. godddaaaaaaaayum that was bittersweet. everyone was really sweet about my leaving too, though i suspect the large quantities of alcohol induced the friendliness. hahaha, since when do i hug eric and jordan and aylz? yea, exactly. they all expect me to be something really great and famous, and it only inspires me to be as cool as they think i'll turn out to be.

people wrote me letters to read on the 5-hour plane ride and i was really moved by them all! i've been spoiled by such good close honest friends over the years. it's amazing. i only hope that i will be able to find more friends as great as my four besties.

right now i'm lying on a bed in a silent humid room. my sister is eating coffee flavoured pocky and reading a book. man this is sad. i don't like goodbyes, but i'm really curious about what is ahead!

loves.

ps. what an optimistic post!