come down, and waste away with me

a vintage scarf for ester.

spent the day talking to denise while lying on the grass at the park. we were total blondes and asked stupid questions

denise: "is oprah her real name?"
me: "... oprah winfrey?"
denise: "o right, oops."

i got bitten hella by bugs but i dont think they're mosquito bites because i've scratched them too death and they haven't bled yet. frikken itchy though. next time i spend hours on a grassy field, i'm wearing long sleeves. gawsh.

dara is back in vancity and we are hoping her mom is not being an anal nazi so that we can go out. i want to go to Guu and eat all the beef tongue and oysters i want. yummers.

i had one meal today. now i'm hungry to think about food. i ate an english muffin when i woke up at noon, which i guess is sustenance, but didnt eat anything until eight hours later except a fresh peach. i took an hour-long nap before dinner. now it's three in the morning and I AM NOT ASLEEP, though i have to wake up at nine. i can't decide if i should stick to some normal sleeping and eating patterns.

can't sleep.

read Tuck Everlasting again. found a quote:

stone walls do not a prison make, nor iron bars a cage.

which is true in the context of the book.

my mom forbids me to find a real job, like a job at safeways or a cafe or a starbucks or a Gap store. i suspect she doesn't want to hear me complain about the shit job if i ever get one. i wouldn't want to hear me complain, are you kidding. for now i'll stick to tutoring.

talked to malcolm about "the best times of your life". the best time of my life was grade five, but i think i'm fooling myself to think that way because i always glorify the sentimental past. grade five kicked ass though. i miss my old elementary school in coquitlam. it was properly generic and happy, not like my super poor, super ghetto school in vancouver.

i have the choice to have the apartment to myself for three days in august. should i say yes? i kind of want to go away to the middle of nowhere, but i want to be here for the end of it all.

i finally got the hang of torrents and downloaded a Pixies album, a Walkmen album, a Foo Fighters album, and the movie Pulp Fiction. i hope i dont become too addicted. i'm spending way too much time on the computer as it already is. sometimes i spend half an hour just playing solitaire on the laptop. haha i am hilarious. i always win, though i get the same satisfaction of victory each time. i'm pro.

haven't heard from ester this entire weekend and some. she must be getting with dave every.single.day. jesus. it is too, too, weird. i desperately hope that mcgill will still accept dave somehow so that he doesn't move to toronto, where i will have to see him in all awkwardness.

hi, marilyn.