we are so morbid. (SUICIDE PUMPKIN!)

HAPPY HALLOWEEN.

there was a pumpking carving contest today and a grade 9 boy cut his finger really badly and there was blood all over his pants and the school floor. i stepped in the pool of blood by mistake because i was backing up to take a picture... then learned it wasnt fake blood o_O. i immediately felt like barfing my insides out. i dont know why everyone else is taking it more lightly than i am. i'm severely scarred from all that blood. i felt like screaming when it happened.

some retarded people were annoying the fuck out of me today, as they've ruined my otherwise perfect day but W/E i dont think i care anymore. sometimes i worry because i'll say something mildly mean/true, and everyone will be like *GASP* THATS SUCH A MEAN THING TO SAY and i'm going there thinking "uhhh that was not even half as mean as what i was thinking... but ok." blargh

we are watching "waking life" in writing class and it is the most difficult movie to comprehend. it's about all this philosophy/existantionalism/solepcism/destiny shite. i was intrigued at first but i need about five minutes to completely understand one minute of that movie. (serious.) it goes something like this:

Woman: Excuse me.
Wiley: Excuse me.
Woman: Hey. Could we do that again? I know we haven't met, but I don't want to be an ant. You know? I mean, it's like we go through life with our antennas bouncing off one another, continously on ant autopilot, with nothing really human required of us. Stop. Go. Walk here. Drive there. All action basically for survival. All communication simply to keep this ant colony buzzing along in an efficient, polite manner. "Here's your change." "Paper or plastic?' "Credit or debit?" "You want ketchup with that?" I don't want a straw. I want real human moments. I want to see you. I want you to see me. I don't want to give that up. I don't want to be ant, you know?

o btw i was a painter for today:

vain. vain. vain. loser

i had a lot of fun ruining this perfectly white shirt

my paint palett for the day

more pixxx to come.

along with my grad writeup, i need to hand in a "baby picture" for the grade 12 yearbook. i dug thru my drawers (which is full of all kinds of shit) and i found this:

jenny and her mommy.

i was 11 months old and my mom was 28... she looks like she's fifteen, though. kind of scary. her hair reminds me of a geisha's... or maybe its her thick makeup. XD

anyway. tomorrow is halloween and i went to the salvation army store in search of a costume. i'm going to be a painter. i bought a men's white shirt and splattered it with paint and chalk. this is what i'm going to look like tomorrow:

painter fenny.

i'm uber excited to show up to skool with all my costume shit on, because i actually like my costume this year. huzzah.

i had a slight bit of a chaotic evening coz my debit card got stolen. noooooot cooooool. i sort of phreaked out. it had to be stolen, not lost. i had it up till yesterday nite. i'm thinking it got stolen in school during my photo class, because i left my bag unattended for a long time and there were maybe 2-3 people in the classroom. everyone else, including the teacher, was in the darkroom...

i've canceled all my shit and everything should be ok now though.

time for me to finish writing up my grad yearbook blurb. gosh how many hours have i spent on this stupid shiz so far? A BILLION HOURS, thats what.

ciao

i think i'm finally done writing a draft of my grad writeup. thank lord. ive fooled around with it too much that it's on the line that seprates genius and crap, leaning towards the craptacular generic side.... umm what? im obvs an insane weirdo perfectionist. i need sleep i think.

my back hurts like a motherfucker. whatta suprise. i wonder if i ever get an operation on my back and when they cut everything open they'll see great big cracks down my spine...

150 words for a freaking grade 12 yearbook blurb is tres impossible. i'm about 16 words over which is annoying me into pieces. meh. i'll deal with it later. right now i need some fucking sleep.

ciao

note the trees because the dirt is temporary

today i dreamed that i found $20.

procrastination to the maxxx.

i think im afraid of everything. altho this realization slightly creeps me out

ive suddenly decided that i need a costume for halloween, but i have zero creative ideas

bye

holycrap i found somebody in my class who does cosplay. AHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAH i think i'm going to die of laughter now.

NERDNERDNERD.

denise and i watched the prestige. it was pretty much mindblowingly complex and amazing at the same time. extremely confusing if you're not paying attention. the storytelling was genius. i was confused/annoyed at first but as the movie went on, i picked up more and more... it was intense. you'd have to be in the mood for an intense movie to enjoy it.

i'm *obsessed* about this movie and i've gone thru imdb boards reading up on analyses. i can't give away any secrets because obvs that would be a spoiler, but do visit those forums after you see the movie. it opens up a lot more questions. [this means you dara!]

when we were in downtown today, there were a ton of people halloweendressed in slutty costumes, etc. kind of sketchy. also there were these dudes who were doing what looked like breakdancing in front of the art gallery. that was cool. ummm the parade of lost souls tonite and i think half the costumepeople dispersed from that event.

i have some else things that i was thinking about today, but i think i'll post that later because my mind is so unsettled. ugh.

the moral for today is that WATCH THE PRESTIGE.

it means i love you

bss is the greatest band at the moment

broken social scene - major label debut (3:26)



um hi i love kevin drew. holy batman.

i'm listening to spoken word by bukowski "the japanese wife"

it's rather strange, but his voice is hypnotic, and his words are good

download it

today after school roxy and i went to safeway and gorged on yummy safeway sandwiches and candy. then we met up with denise and we all went my house (!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and we listened to yeahyeahyeahs, talked. denise ate takeout vietnamese noodles and the whole apartment smells like it.

the new gwen stefani single "wind it up" sucks.

tomorrow i might see "the prestige" with denise. the parade of lost souls [pictured below] is tomorrow but i dont know if i am going.

ps. george strombo has been nominated for the 21st Gemini Award. go VOTE for him. i found that you can vote multiple times on one computer which means they're not checking ip addresses... so maybe vote multiple times =D

my future husband finally has a blog/websitegeorge strombo checks post secret!!!! AWWWWWWWW DUDE.

george is one of my myspace friends. and not yours. probably. therefore i win at life...............

rightoon an irrelevant note, i'm couting down the days till Nov 3rd, for BORAT of course. i saw some previews of it on mtv today and it looks so goddamn offensive and hilarious.i saw alanis morissette on an episode of MTV CRIBS and ew her house is gross. it's all western asian fusion furniture/stuff and she has no idea what she's talking about... she thinks all asia consists of china japan and thailand. cough ignorant cough

SCHOOL OF SOY

ok fine, so my attempt to go to sleep just now failed.

time to waste time/energy on the internet. wheeeee

i want a digital slr camera. i saw a pentax one in a future shop catalog for $700. that is a bargain. sigh.

it's christmas in two months...

i wonder what my life will be like in a year. i mean being in university/college and living in a different city by myself, etc. i'm hella looking forward to getting outta highschool because i want to get away from people who have pre-judgements carved into their minds already. a fresh start would be nice. maybe they'll even consider me normal.

changing people's perceptions about something is hard to do. first impressions are sticky and messy to get rid of. i need to lose my reputation as a loony bin stresshead. but then, maybe i should keep it. i dont really have anything but that. i'd be a blank canvas

byes

i'm sick. hellishly feverish on the inside, and extremely chilled on the outside... i had some medicinal tea that tastes like cherry crap. ewww.

i wrote a poem that i actually like. ive written maybe 2 that i really like. the other one was published in our stupid, tragically unsophisticated school newspaper

i guess i don't feel like doing any more homework. i think i'll go to bed early. like before 1am, for once...

bye

edit: dear patz. power rangers rule but the sailors are SUPERIOR. but then, i am female. i highly enjoyed power rangers when i was 4-5 years old though. true story

my mom is reading this book on the unconscious self written by some american psychiatrist. i dunno whats in the book but now she believes in reincarnation. hmm. i guess she's always kind of been into that except she's talked about it more recently than usual. she isn't at all buddhist/religious, though.

when my dad calls, he likes to talk about how he volunteered w/ the church for the umpteenth time. it gives him happiness, so i guess that's all good... but his being somewhat of a "born-again christian" gives me the creeps still. i dont think he believes in god, but he goes to church anyway and he likes it. although, he used to hate church when we used to all go together. he has his personal reasons for suddenly believing in power of the church....... but i guess that's life

whenever my dad calls and tells that stuff to my mom, she usually ends up annoyed/half-yelling because she finds it so incredibly stupid. my dad and i had a giant talk about CHURCH when i saw him last summer. i tried to explain that i think the idea of organized religion is absurd, in broken korean and a mix of indignant cries of frustration. i dont think it worked.

my grandparents on my dad's side want me to go to church. ahahahahahah. if i DID go to church on a regular basis, i think i'd stop immediately, to spite them.

p.s. do you love my new banner or do you love my new banner
sailor moon rules, but too bad she's not actually innit ahahah

i think dara is probably worshipping it at the moment

did you know that sailor moon was created in 1992? that means it's as old as my sister. WEIRD

ahah
bye

holy flip, its IMPOSSIBLE to write this grad writeup thing. i've looked for MEANINGFUL QUOTES for about seven gazillion hours TO ZERO SUCCESS. they are a) generic b) overused c) irrelevant to grad d) inappropriate e) too depressing or f) SOMEONE ALREADY TOOK IT.

booooooooooo.... =(

anyway i have like six pages worth of ctrl-v'ed quotes on MS word and nothing that really grabs me yet....... dur dur dur. coughperfectionistcough.

my back fucking hurts.

oh shite i didn't do any chem reading. o well

i need to write a poem for my class. a poem on WHAT i dunno!!!! i need iNspIRAtIoN! i have nothing to write about. okay fine today i wanted to write about grade five playground. god i loved grade five, i swear it's the best year of my LIFE with all that elementary school playing and half-innocent half-tween shit, man that was fun. plus it was last year of elementary skool (i went to middle school in gr 6) so it was the PERFECT LEASH LENGTH. old enough to walk around the streets on my own, but not old enough to do stupid shit/obsess over trivialities. perfect.

plus we had grade 5 camp type thing for three days and those were some awesome days, equivalent to my grade 8 strathcona trip almost.

i've nixed the grade 5 playground idea though, because my memory-based poems usually suck. scratch that, my poems just usually suck in general.

then suddenly i wanted to write a poem that was reminiscient of a My Bloody Valentine song/lyrics, but kevin shields is a genius and i can't copy him at all.

i'm left with NO OPTIONS except for retard shit, ie usual "writer" teen ponderingment. eww wait i take that back. theres no way i'll write a poem on that shit. i think i will write a poem about my husband owen pallett except he doesnt know i'm his wife yet. but thats ok. owen is a genius and his cover of the mariah carey song "fantasy" sounds meaningful and almost charming in a nerdgeek way... the way sloan lyrics are charming. CLICK HERE to hear it for yourself.

its five days till my friend's birthday. his birthday is on halloween

i've rambled song enuff... by the way did you know that "hen" backwards is "neh"??????

"neh" is the greatest word ever.

byes

a quiescently frozen confection says:
wow

a quiescently frozen confection says:
somebody just sent me a love poem that was meant for somebody else via msn

a quiescently frozen confection says:
they were going to send me a spanish dialogue but they clicked the wrong thing! how embarrassing hahahahahahaha

- Jen - Fenny says:
omfg.

- Jen - Fenny says:
that.... is HILARIOUS

a quiescently frozen confection says:
i know eh

a quiescently frozen confection says:
HAHAHAHAHA

- Jen - Fenny says:
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

- Jen - Fenny says:
thats gold

a quiescently frozen confection says:
You, are stuck in my head
The way you are, your smile and laugh
Give me enough pleasure for a life and a half
Hearing you giggle fills me with such glee
That I could climb a mountain or thousand foot tree
Doing whatever, it’s time spent with you on the whole
I put everything into it, heart and soul
But really all I want at any given time
Is for me to be yours, and for you to be mine
To spend hours just talking, hours on end
As people who care, as more than just friends
I want to find out what makes you tick
Whose head you imagine on the soccer ball when you kick

- Jen - Fenny says:
omfg..... *DIES*

- Jen - Fenny says:
did you tell the person?

a quiescently frozen confection says:
yeah :P

- Jen - Fenny says:
o god.

- Jen - Fenny says:
thats... REALLY funny



AHAHAHAHA poor guy.

it's a shoreline, it's high speed

we, the grade 12s, took the grad group photo today. all 200-something students in one giant birds-eye-view picture. we spelled out the numbers '07 for our grad year

for some reason when the photo was done, i felt like i just graduated from highschool. not happy, but blank and strange.

i "promised" dara that i would cut down my apparently severe amount of swearing. this is weird because i dont think i swear much...

today's a grey rainy day. cold too. there're chills in my bones. everyone is exhausted and my family members are all taking naps. i feel like i'm in Noah's Ark right now because it's absolutely SILENT outside in the streets, and everything is dim except for this room. usually at this time, the streets would be honking and boinking with cars and people and buses and shits.

guy: do you have any siblings?
jen: yeah i have a sister.
guy: lemme guess, youre the oldest.
jen: ahaaha, you knew that how?
guy: you have an air of maturity, youre kind of reserved... and you want to leave vancouver which is exactly what i wanted to do. i mean, i'm the oldest. like oldest out of my cousins and everything.
jen: ...
jen: actually i'm pretty close to the oldest too, out of all my cousins. maybe 3rd oldest


i miss ____, but i dont know what goes in that blank

dara says i'm a closet emooo. (pronounced emu)

ahahahaha

i kind of have nothing to blog about today. same old, same old.... im sick of my stupid shits and if i am, so is everyone obvs

i should do that writing assignment that was due about a month ago.

i seriously need to take a vow of non-procrastination. one day if i get cancer, i'm probably going to procrastinate going to the hospital for treatment, and then prob die. the tag on my toe will say CAUSE OF DEATH: PROCRASTINATION. ahahaha

woah some neighbour kid downstairs just SCREAMED really weirdly and i could hear it ring out into the empty streets just now. creepy

HELLO AM I DEAD YET

2. Determine the rate law and calculate the specific rate constant for the reaction from the following data. Calculate the initial rate when [S₂O₈^2-] = 5.0 x 10^-4 M.

...


+STAB

la la la. i have a chem test tomorrow. ive taken one look at my review sheets and it's all greek to me.... ughhhhhhhhhh time to agonize over the entire chapterful of pointless shiz.

so i'm trying to collect witty quotes for my grad yearbook blurb but i can't find anything. help.

i had a bad day today. if you couldnt tell ahahaha. although i DID BEAT IAN IN OUR HISTORY ESSAYS BY 1.5 MARKS (3.75%) AHAHAHAHA BURN ON IAN.

we minis dont care about letter grades. we care about percentages.

today in spare, ben and i were listening to his ipod music on my shitty speakers that i brought to skool:

ben: *plays "kick push"*
jen: hey, is this the lupe fiasco song?
ben: yeah
jen: !!!! i like this song!
ben: yeah obviously, coz you like SKATERS... like pat

AHAHAHAHA.

by the way the song does really rule.

i'm supposed to write and hand in my grad yearbook writeup by NEXT MONDAY. that gives me seven whole days! aaaargg fuck. grad writeups are those things, you know, where you write "I HAD A BLAST DURING THE LAST ____ YEARS, BLAH BLAH BLAH HERE IS A MEANINGFUL QUOTE."

uhhhhhhhhhhhhh im in denial. f you all.

hey! by the way i found some people on facebook and i feel like the biggest loser in all of loserland!

what a nerd

summertime, and the livin' is easy

this mp3 was posted on stereogum and stuff... but i just listened to it recently and HOLY CRAP i was surprised that she could sing.

MP3: Scarlett Johansson - Summertime (George Gershwin cover)

to download the song, type in the security code (right topish corner), then click download. you might have to exit out of a "floating" ad first. it should look something like this:


scarlett johansson is amazing and i will love her forever for her role in lost in translation. as someone told me... "i dont care if she makes bad movies for the rest of her life." ahahaha.

i want candy

i vacuumed the entire apartment (something i havent done for a gross amout of time) and cleaned the house... i cleaned and windexed the bathrooms and then attacked UNDER MY BED. ive never seen so many conglomerated balls of dust in my LIFE.

i dusted the rooms then washed the kitchen floor then i cleaned the living room

this is all part of making myself work hard to hide the guilt that has been poking me in the last little while. guilt from being way too lazy and sleeping too much, etc.

i think i inhaled too much dust because my head hurts a lot. uggh. i should go and lie down but i have homework due.

its 12 55am right now and i feel like it should be 8pm. im so goddamn abnormal. can i get a normal sleeping pattern please? when its 4am and silent i get all these artistic ideas, and then i resolve to apply them the next morning. when i wake up i'm like Ew fuck that shit, i need more sleep, and basically sleep away my entire day away... and at nite i'll have the same nightly epiphanies and then make myself promise that i'll DO SOMETHING AMAZING the next day.... and the cycle goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on


- Jen - Fenny says:
im still in the clothes i wore this morning, ie 7 30am

- Jen - Fenny says:
hahahaa i did NOT take a shower today

- Jen - Fenny says:
barf

- Jen - Fenny says:
i watched harry potter II

- Jen - Fenny says:
for about 10 gazillion hours

- Jen - Fenny says:
and family guy

- Jen - Fenny says:
and futurama

.dara says:
lmfao

- Jen - Fenny says:
ive wasted my life today

Dara's birthday

"EMO KID WITH BALLOONS."

i <3 dara! happy 17th xoxoxo

i might see joanna newsom [above photo] in concert. tix went on sale today. $22 plus service charges. come if you wanna. (this means you pwers.)

i'm going to dara's birthday shindig tonite, so maybe i will annoy the 15 people who are coming by going SNAPSNAPSNAP and taking a shitload of photos!

look forward to them pix. (or not.)

ian is NOT, i repeat, NOT coming to the party dinner. SWEET ASS, BEST NEWS OF THE CENTURY.


update: i need to be at lara's right now but i'm so goddamn lazy to even get off my ass and get out of the fucking apartment. i think i have a sleeping disease. i am completely serious.

i think that even if i had a fake id, no one would believe me to be 19 coz i look like a retarded juvenile kid. someone told me all asians look younger than they are that but obvs thats so not the truth.

byes

i didnt do any dishes today

according to my mom, i'm the laziest person in the entire world

i have 2 tests tomorrow and my mom's teaching my class. barf

ima such a failure

must... sleep... eyes are... watering

T_T

ps. guess what song's stuck in my head.... R kelly's "IGNITION"
ahahahahaha

from today's globe and mail "social studies" (yes i did type it out):


"This month, a group of schoolchildren in Liverpool, England, helped foil an attempted armoured-van robbery by memorizing the getaway car’s registration plate in a schoolyard chant, police report. A passerby spotted the car, but feared she would forget the plate number so she asked a group of children to memorize it. The group of 9- and 10-year-olds remembered the registration details by singing the numbers in a chant, before a classmate arrived with a pen. The three thieves were traced and arrested within 40 minutes."


... awesome

god i can't wait for Borat to come out. nov 3rd! nov 3rd! nov 3rd! i need another geek to see it with me, yo. (highly highly improbable).hahaha i can already bet that i will be seeing this alone if i do end up going to the theatre.

grrrrls on tv!

beyourownpet

my life is currently at a 9 on the life-sucks meter. you know, 10 being the highest level of shittiness

AHHHHH SOMEBODY SHOOT ME WITH AN EMO GUN.

btw, did you guys look at xtina's (the ex-mini one) facebook pictures? holy batman, how can anyone be that gorgeous slash anorexic?

a lot of pigeons attacked me today while i was eating lunch.

hey did you know that "saw" is "was" backwards? COOL

...

gosh i need to get out of my head. i gross myself out

bye

went to the writers festival. this one woman mandy sayer was talking about her new memoir and talking about her life basically, complete with a slideshow of photos n everything. since she was 16 she's traveled around australia and the us with her dad, a jazz drummer, street performing with puppets and tapdancing and shit. a lot of crazy things etc. afterwards lara and i felt shitty about own lives because ours are so uninteresting... saw that coming from a mile away

some drama is going around the school and i cant get anyone to tell me what happened exactly. i miss one day of school to a field trip and see what happens eh? giant fatload of dramaramagossip. its one of those things that if YOU'RE part of it, its completely serious, but if youre not involved, it just seems like everyone's acting like babies. ehn.

i think if somebody wrote a book about us and our little shits (i mean me and the mini peeps plus little others) it would be the most comical book ever. mostly because its so sad

BE YOUR OWN PET.

ewwww can i quit life please? barf barf barf. there are about 250 kids in my grade and there are probably just as many cliques its disgusting. alternate univeses galore. how gross. im totally not allowed to talk tho coz im pretty biased and stereotyped. cough hypocrite cough

i dont know if you can tell, but Be Your Own Pet is my new favourite band and jemina rules.

on a completely irrelevant note: i think something's wrong with my head. how can i like things in theory when i dislike it in real life? how can i call for certain things when i dont practice them myself? ugh i should just stop blogging. i realize too often of all the bullshit i talk

i'm going to granville island all day tomorrow for a field trip, the WRITERS FESTIVAL how fun doo doo doo doo doot doola doot doo doot doo!

i was in writing class today and somehow the talk turned to the topic of discrimination against first nations peoples in canada, etc. those sticky issues. i was absolutely HORRIFIED with what some of the kids said.

dumb shit: i think first nations people should just stop drinking and get jobs. i mean, they get tax breaks and all that kind of stuff, i think white people have been WAY too forgiving to them. they dont have to pay taxes and sure, they had to go to residential schools, they don't have to do that anymore. we've been, like, totally forgiving, like, totally.


lara and i were actually open-mouthed, incredulous. at least i know i was. we were staring at Dumb Shit with red laser eyes, hoping to turn her into a puddle of goo. ahahahaha.

me: ... you have got to be fucking joking me.

some kid, to the dumb shit: you DO know that its the white people who introduced them to alcohol, and that they have lower tolerance? and that its the white people who took over their land?


i think i'd be bad at debating. rude words were about to pop out of my throat.

i'm dumb, she's a lesbian

denise and i are trading cds. i think everyone who has cds should negotiate with me because i have stacks of cds that i have never touched for about a year. like my nine inch nails. i havent listened to it once. i think i bought it for like $20 too. im not so thrifty.

GUYSSSS which is better, audioslave or weezer?

ok nevermind, that question was totally a rhetorical/stupid one to ask, considering the blog crowd audience...

bah i need to go to a concert or something but im so damn ass broke.

i got a facebook account. god how lame am i? it's pretty much identical to myspace except you can't use html/css (therefore less fancy schmancy), doesnt have any of that music crap, and also its harder to stalk people. um not that i stalk people but its just how the things areeeee

right.

i had a shitload to say but i forget. ermm. life is ok although i had a spaz attack on sunday/monday/yesterday because of my job. which... i am quitting. ahaha. nice knowing you, my fellow weirdo coworkers and downtown hobos. there has been some dramarama at work, ie. on my second shift, i had to deal with a dude w/ a stolen credit card... we called the cops and everything.

i forget how to blog. i havent checked the internet for days and days and now that i'm back, its completely dead as if nothing's happened.

greetings y'all.

i havent updated this thing in TWO WHOLE DAYS how amazing. ive been having a life. actually scratch that, ive been incredibly dead/tired yesterday and stressed on top of that, today went by in a fucking blur and i was as tired and absentminded as nonexistant smoke that rise above the pavement in the summer. dur dur dur im hyper but i must do some hwk soon. i should explain all this later or maybe i wont.

IM ON FUCKING 25PEEPS!!!!!!!!!!!!! ZOMG. non-blog people: click on that link, over and over and over again, so that i get all ultra-nerdypopular. click the link every time you come to my blog. dood. blog-people: you know the drill. prob.

I MUST GO DO HWK right now. oh ya btw i'm going to italy and switzerland for a school trip. SWEET

byebyes!

currently going insane. i need to stop being perfectionistic because otherwise i'm going to blow a fuse in my head and turn into a vegetable

can i switch brains with somebody please

ps. im debating whether i should stop posting pix on buzznet. i duno everyfreakingthing in the universe is irking me today

so... f'ing... tired.


*dies*

its so grey and rainy today, i feel like sleeping and never coming out of the bed

my procrastination will be the death of me

haha no shit.

went to korean school this morning and i am in such a lovehate relationship with it. plus there are some other things hmm hmm hmm hmm. durrrrrrrrr

im bad at being coolly mysterious

es and neese did their SAT's today and then we met up for lunch with lara in white spot. i had cream of cauliflower soup. i mooched off some fries. etc. es and neese saw justin. he wore a frigging RUSSIAN FUR HAT, apparently, and cracked random jokes, to everyone's confused faces/hilarity. note: he is far from russian. sounds like his usual self.

ester should stop stealing my ex lover dudes.

wow that was the stupidest comment ive made all day. denise is going to laugh at me

yay/ugh weekend. im feeling sickish and sleepy and totally unsociable... i had a giant nap today. not normal. well, not normal as in people standards. its what i do practically every weekend though.

i feel like an old woman or something all i need are a houseful of dirty cats except i am not an animal person at all so prob some junk/clutter then i should be set to go about my meh ways.

so justin timberlake is my favourite person in the universe, as of this nanosecond. that feeling will go fleeting away soon though

my sister is being the biggest idiot prat. i need earplugs so i dont have to listen to her

including me, there are maybe 5 people in the class who knows what torrents are. this makes me feel like a total hermitgeek who does nothing but internetize all day

i have to wake up early tomorrow and ive procrastinated too much and i feel like complete crap right now. bye

i want to defy the logic of all sexx laws

random pictures from a pointless school day. some of the pictures i took of Es are amazing (she was giddy and hyper today) and i should be paid to photograph people. ugh. sorry im vain with my fucking stupid obsession with portaits of people

*RANDOMRANDOMRANDOM*

clothpins.... hawt

doesnt she wook so wuvley

roxy gave me a creepy old man smile.

dara, the aluminum can. ugh

scarf lady.

i say this picture defines ester
roxy and fenny

losers

the rest are up on buzznet, etc. god i have nothing to say except complaints today.
WHATTA POINTLESS DAY, YO.

i came home at 2 45pm after school and then i took a nap till 5pm. i had the biggest nightmare during that nap, though. i was dreaming of this new freakish stepford-wives-y town, and there was this huge mansion, and i was opening about a billion doors to look at all the rooms. i was highly distressed for some reason, and things seemed kind of fuzzy.

whenever i opened a door in, it was a bathroom, and every time i found a bathroom, I tried to take a shower, but each bathroom always had a problem, like the doorknob wouldn’t lock or there were no shower curtains or there would be water on the floor and therefore it would be too slippery for my liking, etc. for some reason i was so, so, so upset and afraid that i couldn't take my shower.

i woke up extremely agitated and i thought for a minute that my dream had really happened. i had such a bad, ominous feeling i thought i was going insane.

anyway. it was pretty creepy... left me feeling sort of schizo or something.

i went to work and signed some forms, etc. i begin my job training on sunday. how exciting. wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. i congratulated myself by swiping the debit and buying 2 cds, both beck. midnite vultures and the new one, the information. see, now i have all those excessive STICKERS THAT YOU CAN CREATE YOUR OWN CD-COVER WITH! fantastic.

rather pointless news, but when i was going to work (downtown), an entire portion of robson street was blocked off, and there were about 20 ambulances, fire trucks, vans, and police cars. apparently there was a hazmat (hazardous materials) thing going on. people in yellow boots and silver suits. i have no idea how/where it exactly happened, though. it was right in front of pacific centre, the department store.

i was thinking about this today, but peter said it simply:

North Korea now has nuclear weapons.

The United States says they will not invade.

Iraq was supposed to have nuclear weapons. But of course didn't.

The United States was in there very very quickly.

Where's the logic?

and yes that question is supposed to be rhetorical, etc.

FREE.

YAY RANDOM PICTURES

from sept/oct

lara looks REALLY scandinavian or something. like heidi

wheeeeeeefsdlkfaslf

me and dara, while sitting on the mini hill

dar's face is too funny... she wouldnt let me post the funniest one tho

oh jesus, denise you are such a hipster.

the vest reminds me of the sexyback video

this is denise's lover.

and this dude too. ahahaha

reminder. this is denise

this picture pretty much sums up our retarded tomfoolery
during our lunchtimes

senior guys vball game. i dunno why i even watched

keep denise away from dangerous equipment, ie field hockey stix.

i made it the desktop wallpaper. im so clever

we will vacation, you can be my parasol!

crazy shit, yo

roxy, when she had her lil episode.

dare eats her tomato like an apple.
see how she ponders

then she ponders some more

wow the school is EMPTY and its FRIDAY and we're still HERE
(dara ran round the hall smashing into all the lockers etc.)

THE REST OF THE PIX ARE UP ON BUZZNET.

dressed to kill, you look so right

i went to a postsecondary thing tonite and it made me want to go to ubc even less. yawn im so bored of vancouver i need to get outta here but i'm kind of a hypocrite coz i dont like big huge changes and i cling onto the past the way old grandmas do, etc. i dont think i'll survive my first year university away well. mostly coz i am pretty much inadaptable

even if i do end up adapting well i'll complain a shitload in the process.

anyway i did an amazing load of work in a short amount of time, ie i was really concentrated and not fooling around while "studying" for a 6-hr period. i studied for like 30 minutes straight it was amazing. altho i still am under-studied for that giant ass essay tomorrow, i dont think i will be doing any more work coz im really hungry and i feel like chopping off my painful leg and then going to sleep.

i dont know why but im always laden with back/knee/leg pains and i have to roll an entire stick of sports analgesic stuff everyday, im pretty much immune to the stuff by now. kind of the way ellen is immune to advil after taking it for half her life. how ironic i dont do any crazy sports ah ha ha ha

this is random so i' gues i'll post it and then get ready for bed since NO ONE IS ONLINE. bah

p/s. my mom bought a stick of salami and i am in love with it. ive eaten half the stick today and i think i have a stomache ache

im on the verge of flipping out right now.

i think i make myself about 100x more stressed than necessary by freaking out, then by freaking about the fact that i'm freaking out, and on and on. the fact is, by freaking out all this time, i dont actually get anything done. ever.

i have about 10,000 assignments/tests/things to worry about due within the next two weeks or so (only slight exaggeration). mhmhmhm hooray

p/s. i got the new sloan album and i must review it by friday. yikes

one of the things i excell in doing is PISSING PEOPLE OFF with my words and i feel like doing a lot of that today. i would write shit here but whatever, ranting about people on my blog is soooo last year.

im eating spanish olives out of the jar and licking olivejuicewater off my fingers. yummers

bye

happy dara!

Hi hi hi hi hi.

in spare block today, a bunch of us gossiped about shiz and it made me go LA LA LA IM NOT LISTENING for large parts of it, ie it went something like this:

ben: you know pat's been recieving roses from random girls for the last four years 'round valentines day.
ester: =O for real?
ian: O RLY?
me: >_> ... *runs*

oh god. that has got to be one of the lowest points ever. TOPIC CHANGE!

guhhh i have a series of tests this week. today my super disorganized history teacher goofed off and gave us a totally random test cooked up from a dozen different sources, half the test wasn't even stuff we learned yet. THEREFORE WE PROBABLY ALL FAILED.

right...

i subscribed to the new yorker magazine. wow im such a fucking hipster. yuppie-wannabe. teh shit. next thing you know i'll be eating bagels with black coffee. oh wait i already drink black coffee. anyway i know it will be a good read and i needed a magazine to replace my dying subscription to adbusters and chart. these days i only read pfork and the front page section of the globe and mail. i read y.t. (the paper i write for) if i feel extremely juvenile.

i have about 20 gazillion things to write but im so lazy and i keep just dragging my ass every day thinking, thinking, thinking about it. perfectionist procrastination boils in my blood and i will probably be 40 years old before i write something noteworthy.

rambleramble.

:O

I GOT THE JOB!

=D


ps. i cleaned my room and it's so freakish neat, i can actually DO MY HOMEWORK at my desk. amazing.

one and a half years ago, i was 15 years old:

april 21, 2005
SANS POINT

That's 'pointless' in french. That's also how my day at school is so far. School is so weird these days I don't understand how I was able to do homework regularly at the right times back in grade 8/9. Everyone's eating lunch and people are being retards as usual, or being in a sucky mood, or "depressed", or actually depressed, or hyper, or pissed, or whatever.

Whatever.

What a sucky blog post for a sucky day.


BAHAHAHAHA. RETARDED NOSTALGIA OVERLOAD!
ahhhh i remember those good ole days...

north korea tested out their nukes in spite of international pressure and the world is pissed off and very antsy about it. dun dun dun. it made front page of newspaper this morning. my mom is worried. she gets visible headaches, you can see them coming from a mile away. and i dont want anything bad to happen. it scares me.

unrelated (old) news: a south korean dude is going to be the next UN Secretary General starting on New Years, 2007. i'm actually excited because of this. the last time the UN had an asian secretary general was 1961-1971.

i was leafing through my history text today and apparently Lester Pearson was supposed to be the first ever UN secretary general, except the USSR opposed it. what! i had no idea. it really would have been his claim to fame, and canada's, if he were, though.

ok bye.

oh fuck. i should get the award for the world's least productive person ever. i did nothing today except go to the frigging mall. shopping takes every morsel of energy i have.

so, that said, tomorrow is going to be my shit homework day.

barf.

dur dur dur i was searching aimlessly thru flickr and looked at all these pictures of yummy food. i think i am enlightened...

MY NEWEST LIFE GOAL

IS TO LEARN HOW TO COOK AS MUCH STUFF AS POSSIBLE.

HAPPY TURKEY DAY, Y'ALL

i bought a short black dress for grad pix today. the black ribbon one from le chateau, if you were there when i tried it on... blah blah blah. i came home and rummaged through my shit to find my black and silver necklace to wear w/ the dress but IT'S MISSING and i felt like kicking the wall coz this means i have to find something else to wear. I HATE SHOPPING FOR CLOTHES WITH A PURPOSE.

i have a freaking headache from being in that inane, stupid mall for two days in a row. i think my brain is going to turn into a goldfish bowl.

anyway the highlight of my day was a purdy's ice cream cone, chocolate with nuts on top... so delicious i nearly died.

in completely irrelevant news: people, UPDATE YOUR FRIGGING BLOGS. i've been clicking my way to the same 20 or so blogs for the last whatever hours for the last whatever weeks, and there are really only 3 or 4 that update regularly........... its driving me nuts.

i think i'm all adhd when it comes to reading blogs. i need something to read at the snap of my fingers.

anyway the internet is all dull and i think i prefer to study for my goddamn exam right now.

im going to go on threadless and buy my sister's birthday gift RIGHT NOW then write a super funny insane book of geeky inside jokes

... her birthday is nov 3rd

im so prepared
sweet

my sister is obvs going be 1000x richer/more successful than me when we're both adults. i dunno. we are good at making each other feel inadequate coz she thinks im perfect and i envy her unlinear brilliance.

ps. i love beck's album MIDNITE VULTURES. flawless geniussssssss I HEART BECK FOR ETERNITY. kthxbi

until the day you die, you'll always admit that you were right, you were right

when we were at tim horton's, this 50something man handed out little leaflets. he was pretty well groomed and wore a sweatshirt and a baseball cap. when i looked at him he waved at me then gave me a leaflet and smiled and i looked down at the leaflet and it said "I AM A DEAF PERSON" and "i am selling this deaf education system for $1.00 to $5.00". in the leaflet were hand language signs for thankyou boy girl sorry go stop etc. anyway i gave him some money because he was very nice about it and then he bowed and blew me a kiss. i had to smile

am i thinking about this more than i should be, dunno

im listening to music from the 1940 disney FANTASIA. what a classic. right now it's at toccata and fugue in d minor and i LOVE it. yea im geeky so what.

today denise dara and i went shopping for GRAD DRESSES, omfgzsdaflksdjfsd. h-core productive shopping, we went from one store to another, trying about a billion dresses... anyway whatever i'll buy one tomorrow because i have a bunch of them on hold. i'm not about to describe dresses right now.

after shoppin we were way exhausted, so we bought cheap-ass takeout sushi and ate it at a timmy ho's. so much food and now i'm stuffed.

trying on dresses reminds me how incredibly obese i am AHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA. anyway sizes are weird, at one point i wore a size 0 then at another store, i had to wear size 5, etc. ya w/e i'm being stupid right now

im tired as hell. plus a bit depressed coz i hate thinking about grad photos which leads to prom which leads to END OF HI!SCHOOL then on to university blah basdafksdlfsfsalfsfsdfsdfsaf. i want to see my hischool friends when im old. honestly this is the first time i've felt sad thinking about that possibility that i will not be able to see my friends when im gone outta here.