went out with lara today and talked about shit. now my head is full of thots.

im having minor epiphanies everywhere, like did you know that brutal honesty is not really honesty>? when i was in grades nine and ten, i used to think being super cynical and brutal as hell was the way to go. it really isn't. being supercynical is fake as shit, because no one is really truly supercynical unless they try to be on purpose. (on purpose = not being yourself, or at least stretching/exaggerating it).

it's like the political spectrum in the way that how extreme left wing communist is exactly same as extreme right wing fascist, they are both totalitarian fucked up shit, and it really is the same if you look at it from a distance. opposite but completely the same. being super cynical and brutal and fakeangry does not make you more real, it means you are just as fake as the people who are fakely overly happy.

i dunno why im so obsessed about "fake" and "phony" shit.

anyway lara and i went out and talked and went to the park and lay in the grass etc coz shes leaving for the okanagon to pick cherries for two weeks.

plus i visited her cat. im catsitting this summer.


ps. i have no idea what i said in this post.